Season 5/Episode 10: The Power of No!

[00:00:03] Welcome to The Messy Mind podcast, a show to support you in seeing the messiness can lead to your live bulb moments on your host, Tammy L. Davis. In the world when of our daily lives where the lines between whole work and self blur

[00:00:24] into one continuous cycle of task is easy to forget the power vested in one tiny word. No. Yet, the simple word is a mighty tool for carving out a sense of self amidst the chaos

[00:00:41] and really making sure that you don't lose sight of what truly matters. I want to offer a few tips on how you can implement and really stand in the power of no. Number 1. The Importance of Boundaries We all know where boundaries are but let me just give

[00:01:00] your reminder. They are the mental, emotional and physical limits we establish to protect ourselves. They help us express what we are comfortable with and how we would like to be treated by others. When you effectively set boundaries they can lead to improve relationships, a better work-life

[00:01:19] balance and a true deeper understanding of our personal needs so really understand the importance of boundaries. Tip number two, understand your limits. Do you often find yourself exhausted? Still saying yes to every request? The path to empowerment begins with recognizing

[00:01:40] the signs of overcommentment. It's about understanding that when your cup is empty you cannot pour into others. You are operating on E. Recognizing your limits is the first step towards setting boundaries.

[00:01:57] Tip number three, the power of no in work. Yes, your workplace. Work demands can be insatiable. Learning to say no to additional class that exceed your capability at that moment is not only about self-preservation,

[00:02:16] it's about focusing on what you can do well. It isn't about shrinking or backing away from your responsibility, it's about working smarter not harder. So that's probably one of my favorite tips

[00:02:30] tip number three, the power of no in your work in your workplace. Tip number four, and this is another one of my favorites, setting boundaries at home. At home no can actually be a chorus sung for harmony.

[00:02:46] It really is about founding balance and the give and take of family life, whether it's negotiating and I say negotiating but really it's about delegating who will handle the evening chores or carving out some time to yourself after the kids are bed, setting those boundaries is essential

[00:03:06] for a healthy home life. So if you were to scroll through my phone, you would see when our kids were younger. At five years old we would set the stool up to the sink and they would watch dishes. Yes,

[00:03:21] I said negotiating but it's about delegating and making it a family affair that will help you support your boundaries at home. And when I say family affair, making sure that everyone participates in the chores at home. The next tip self care isn't selfish. Neglecting self care is like

[00:03:42] it really is like slowly chipping away at the foundation of a house and you, your temple, your entire being, your body is that temple. It is the foundation of the house. Eventually you know when things

[00:03:56] start chipping away at the foundation they will crumble. Saying no to make room for self care is in just okay it's crucial. Now this might look like saying no to invitation that you might have received

[00:04:11] you know to go out for drinks or dinner with one of your friends or coworkers or even and this is what I'm really big on and really try my best to do stepping away from your desk

[00:04:23] for a lunch time walk. Remember self care is in selfish and I just want to leave you also with some practical ways that you can say no. It really is an art but it can be as simple as

[00:04:37] our pre-shature offer but I can't commit to that right now or let me get back to you or even let me think about it, really gives you time and space and the positive know really involves acknowledging the request explaining your reasoning for declining and offering an alternative solution

[00:04:58] and that alternative solution can be as honest as I don't have the band with right now. That's my thing when someone perfect example, our daughter is going to be on a travel team this summer

[00:05:10] and they always look to me to be when I say they internally you know my daughter must because they know how operate. I have a very high attention to detail and sometimes these travel teams can be

[00:05:21] very unorganized. Now prayerfully thank Lord the one that she's on this year they are extremely organized and I love it but before we knew that my husband and daughter were looking at me like

[00:05:33] oh are you going to be the team mom this year and I'm like don't even ask my band with I'm at my max again explaining the reason why you're declining acknowledging the question

[00:05:44] offering alternative solution is going to be key and I just want to leave you with this. Remember the power of no is a yes to yourself. Thank you for joining us this time on the Messy Mind podcast.

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